Allan
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On Sun, Jul 22, 2012 at 9:44 AM, James <ashkashal@gmail.com> wrote:
I was just reading the news, a rare occurrence, another reminder why.. Somewhere under contempt, anger, and shame is will, a couple leaps further to hope, pride gets a bad treatment in the process but is replaced with resolve. One matter stands out though. That is the role of acceptance and how it can develop into affirmations, I think that comes into the resolve stage.
Just a few of my reflections, I am certainly open to input.
On 7/21/2012 10:21 PM, James wrote:
And predators of every sort, it is hard to resist the urge to stand in
front like a wolverine at times. Some things turn the stomach, white
heat is one, but it pays to understand the flame.
On 7/20/2012 2:22 AM, Allan H wrote:
Personally I do take my personal responsibility very seriously,, but I
am not preoccupied or at least I hope.. I do think there is a certain
responsibility one has to keep vigilance and pull the fire alarm when
there is a 'fire' unfortunately there are a lot of fires..
Allan
On Fri, Jul 20, 2012 at 6:30 AM, James <ashkashal@gmail.com
<mailto:ashkashal@gmail.com>> wrote:
Not sure if they would like the term "preoccupation" with the
connotation of cultural values laden judgment but it sounds fair.
Mostly his perspective sounds reasonable given circumstances and I
can relate to a bit of it, but "morbid" seemed the best way to
describe the challenges. For one this person takes personal
responsibility very seriously but gives no sign of it because it is
a "vulnerability" people will take advantage of, he seems to have an
automatic fear response to happiness (seems like hypervigilance but
might be pathological fear), is very opposed personally to
spontaneous or excited behaviors but sees it as self discipline and
carefully manages what thoughts or emotions are shown. Much of this
sounds like he took life's lessons a little too seriously from a
young age, but that is where identity comes into play. The
existential definition that I think results by one's experience with
the world, and how that shapes subconscious behaviors, not known but
responded to automatically. I think that is where much of the
difficulty comes from in his case, the nature of his existence
defined by the world, and the resistant morbid part is the response
to those pressures. Where the world judged him harshly for being
different he learned most couldn't find waldo on a plain sheet of
paper. After listing a number of things that are different he had a
smile and pointed out that his challenges are not so different from
that of many others except the circumstances (existential definition
I take it) in sum were not typical enough for conventional answers,
they all lead back to square one.
It was strange to hear strong emotions from such a disciplined
person but I found it somewhat relieving, he still doesn't fit the
mold on offer, it is inspiring. So I'm not sure what kind of advice
to give or ask about, perhaps there is more perspective out there
somewhere?
On 7/19/2012 6:35 PM, rigsy03 wrote:
I had another thought on self-forgiveness/morbid preoccupation: One
may have lost all perspective and forgotten the suffering in this
world and neglected to count the blessings. Then it also depends on
one's culture which might inflict a very distorted view of
anything it
choses so the individual doesn't know any better. Families can
also be
so dysfunctional that normal doesn't exist or develop properly.
Not sure the doctors are making profits as much as insurance and
drug
companies, shrinks and "counsellors". Then, the attorneys!
On Jul 19, 11:44 am, Allan H<allanh1...@gmail.com
<mailto:allanh1...@gmail.com>> wrote:
Morbid would be an excessive preoccupation with and event or
sin.. Finally
started to figure it out..
Yes I know of the excessive cost of people taking advantage
of a program
that can be for free. When I came into AA the rich mans
programs were just
starting.. I was to poor so they didn't want anything to do
with me.. so I
became sober the old fashion way, not drinking and going to
meetings.. it
will still work today but that is to cheap for the greedy
medical
community.
Allan
On Thu, Jul 19, 2012 at 3:38 PM, rigsy03<rigs...@yahoo.com
<mailto:rigs...@yahoo.com>> wrote:
Jumping in here- my idea of "morbid guilt" would be that
which
paralyzes development past a trauma. It is different
than the tumbling/
domino reaction that a traumatic event sparks- more like
physics or
chemical reaction, in a way. But...what is identity?
I don't find you "simple", Allan. Why do you disparage
yourself? Thank
you for being "here" so loyally- whatever "here" means! :-)
Back to your comment about AA- essentially a seflish
program of
necessity. Older alcoholics who had money would go to
spas and
steambath their way to sobriety- until the next bout. I
never even
heard of AA until I was in my 30's- at that point I
joined an Alanon
group at a nearby church but think the divorce rate
pretty high from
that group- it probably was part of the motive of
joining up- keeping
score, so to speak, rather than understanding the
spiritual element.
At the same time, treatment centers started springing
up- last I
heard, getting sober might cost 5 figures a month. There
is another
element now of drug addicts going to AA rather than
narco-something
which introduces a whole new can of worms. Anyway, I
think drinking
alone is what got me in trouble when all the children
had "graduated"
the nest- but I was ripe, anyway. lol I really don't
miss drinking but
have thought if I got a fatal diagnosis in the future, I
might need a
few shots of single malt whiskey to ease the way to
eternity.
On Jul 19, 2:48 am, Allan H<allanh1...@gmail.com
<mailto:allanh1...@gmail.com>> wrote:
I know I am simple James, but what do you mean by
morbid guilt?
Allan
On Thu, Jul 19, 2012 at 5:59 AM,
James<ashkas...@gmail.com
<mailto:ashkas...@gmail.com>> wrote:
On 7/17/2012 6:50 AM, Molly wrote:
I have a friend who is contemplating self
forgiveness. Any
suggestions?
Look back from a context of greater maturity, in
the meantime apply
time
and experience: pursue excellence, appreciate
moderation, respect
processes.
Through personal growth pieces of the story
begin falling in place,
motives are replaced with expanded and stronger
ones.
Morbid guilt might be another matter, where it
mixes with identity
seems
very elusive. I have a friend that would much
appreciate your input.
--
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|_D Allan
Life is for moral, ethical and truthful living.
--
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|_D Allan
Life is for moral, ethical and truthful living.- Hide quoted
text -
- Show quoted text -
--
(
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|_D Allan
Life is for moral, ethical and truthful living.
(
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|_D Allan
Life is for moral, ethical and truthful living.
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